Molly Heller and Family

Marriage equality supporters and opponents gathered at the Rhode Island State House on Wednesday, Feb. 9, 2011. The House Judiciary Committee heard testimony on two measures that would grant marriage rights to gay and lesbian couples. COLAGE leader Molly Heller submitted her testimony. Read it below!

Rhode Island State Legislature
r.e. Bill 5744

Dear Legislators and Conscientious Citizens of Rhode Island:

Good Evening.

My name is Molly Heller.  I am one of the founding members of national organization called COLAGE — People with a Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trasngender, or Queer Parent.  COLAGE was an inspiration, created 20 years ago in a small conference room by people whose history was forged by having parents who were gay, at a meeting in Boston for GLBT families.  My sister and I, with four other sons and daughters of gay and lesbian parents, sat on the floor in a room barely bigger than a closet, talking about our love for our family, and the pain that we suffered from societal discrimination.  We left the conference that day after making a pact that we would create an organization for sons and daughters of GLBT families…something that we accomplished with countless hours of hard work, tears, frustrations, and emotional turmoil, culminating with an organization, that by today’s inspection, has achieved national notoriety and significance — beyond our wildest expectations.  This happened because in a time of widespread discrimination against gay and lesbian families, we forged ahead, fought against bigotry, for basic civil rights, and made change. That was one challenge that we met head on.  But we are here today for something equally important: to establish equal rights of marriage, rights granted to every heterosexual couple in the state, to gay and lesbian couples.

How did this become a mission for me?  My mother is gay.  As a child and to this day, she has taught me to be proud of who I am and to stand up for what I believe in.  Growing up I knew that our society did not accept my family because of who my mom loved.  I wondered why, and I kept my family a secret — fearing hate and bigotry.  Today, this discrimination and homophobia still exists…but I now speak to you with pride for my family.  Yet, I remain baffled that such flagrant, open discrimination not only exists, but is empowered by the current laws that prohibit gay marriage.

To me, it is very simple: everyone is entitled to basic civil rights — to vote, to work, to own land, to serve,…and yes, to love, and to marry who one loves.  Let me say that again.  Everyone deserves the basic civil right to marry who they love.  This is not about personal beliefs, religious beliefs, or fear-mongering.  It’s a simple civil rights issue — no different than those fought by people of color, by women, and yes, now by the gay and lesbian population – equal rights for all.

When I met my husband, we didn’t have to worry about our rights as a couple.  We didn’t have to be concerned about our rights as parents, or about our children’s rights and their and our legal protection.  These were fundamental, inalienable rights we were blessed with as citizens of this great country.  Unfortunately, gay families around the world, and even here in Rhode Island, worry about their legal protection every day.  I am hopeful that my children will grow up knowing their grandmother has the same legal rights as their parents, no matter who she loves.
Please, let’s work together and pass one of the most important bills in our history.  We, as citizens of the State of Rhode Island, must stand behind those basic civil rights that we are all given.  Let us protect, support, and celebrate children and their parents.  It is unconscionable to leave gay families behind.  To quote Abraham Lincoln: “MY DREAM IS OF A PLACE AND A TIME WHERE AMERICA WILL ONCE AGAIN BE SEEN AS THE LAST BEST HOPE ON EARTH.”
Sincerely yours,

Molly Heller