Casey and her moms.

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Testimony supporting the Civil Unions Bill before the Senate and House in Dover, Delaware by Casey Lyn Goold.

Good afternoon. My name is Casey Lyn Goold, I am 26 years old, I am a college graduate, I own my own business, I am working on a second degree, and I have 2 moms.

I was raised by my mother, Lynda who was a single mom until my early adult life, when she met her now committed partner, Debbie, a woman with an amazing heart, who I am honored to call my second mom. Debbie has become someone I can confide in, someone I can go to for guidance, and someone who will console me when life just seems too tough. I am blessed to have the family I have now. We have financial stability, we have a house which we call our home, and we have one another. However, that could all be taken from us like that because the relationship my mother’s have is not recognized. It sickens me to think that my mother and I may be refused the right to have a final goodbye if something should happen to my mom Debbie because their relationship is not legally bound. Dying in a hospital room alone because your life partner and your family are not legally recognized as your immediate family is completely inhumane. Being denied the right to give final respects to a woman who has been a major part of my life just because she is not legally recognized as a member of my family is unfathomable. I cannot even begin to imagine what mental and emotional impact this will have on a child much younger than myself who has 2 moms or 2 dads.

With issues that are much more substantial like, global warming, unemployment, and poverty, it seems completely senseless to me that we are trying to ban love.

I ask you today to PLEASE vote YES to pass SB 30, to allow my family and quit a bit of families out there just like mine, the right to love with dignity, the
right to protect and ensure the quality of the lives we have built together, the right to protect the stability of our homes, and the right to maintain equal family rights.

Black, White, Catholic, Muslim, Irish, German, left-handed, right-handed, blonde haired, red haired, Gay, or Straight, we are all pink on the inside. We all bleed red. And we all deserve equal rights!

Thank you!

COLAGE families featured on Delaware Online:

“I love my father — even more since he’s been able to be more true to himself,” Brian said. “Our relationship got far more honest.”

“For many children of LGBTQ (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, questioning) parents, having a family that’s treated differently and discriminated against can be isolating or challenging,” said Tipping, who now leads the group with Patty Irwin. “But when they meet others who can appreciate that experience because they’ve been there, they feel seen, heard and understood — often for the first time.”That’s how Daryl Cramer felt, and so did three of his buddies — Dakota, Jeffrey and Kyle, the 11-year-old triplet sons of Eve Davis and her former partner, Ingrid. The triplets were among the first to join COLAGE. Read the full story>

Casey Lyn Goold Testifies in Delaware:

“It sickens me to think that my mother and I may be refused the right to have a final goodbye if something should happen to my mom Debbie because their relationship is not legally bound.” Read her full testimony>

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Tuesday, May 3rd, 2010
Contact: Sarah Baldauf, (202) 225-3202

STARK: “EVERY CHILD DESERVES A FAMILY”
Reintroduces Legislation to Eliminate Discrimination in Foster Care and Adoption

WASHINGTON – Rep. Pete Stark (D-CA), ranking member on the Ways & Means Health Subcommittee, today reintroduced the “Every Child Deserves a Family Act,” H.R. 1681, with 33 original cosponsors. The legislation addresses the critical shortage of stable, safe and loving homes currently available to children in our foster care system. The legislation would set a federal baseline that puts an end to prejudiced restrictions that have denied an untold number of children the homes that they desperately need.

The Every Child Deserves a Family Act would ban discrimination in adoption or foster care placement based on the sexual orientation, marital status or gender identity of the potential parent, or the sexual orientation or gender identity of the child.

Rep. Pete Stark (D-CA): “We now spend more than $7 billion per year on a flawed foster care system that doesn’t serve all the children who are in it, and permits discrimination against capable, loving potential parents and children. It’s time for a federal fix to this critical child welfare and civil rights issue. Every child deserves the lifelong benefits that come from growing up in a stable home.”

Rep. Jim McDermott (D-WA): “The facts are clear: children fare far better in a safe, supportive, loving home. Just like straight parents, lesbian and gay parents can provide this, yet many states won’t allow it, while using federal funds to discriminate. This legislation simply says to states, ‘if you choose to use federal dollars, you can’t discriminate against prospective parents – or against these children.’ This is about common sense and fairness.”

Recent attempts have been made in states – including Virginia, Arizona and Illinois – to further restrict who can adopt, making the Every Child Deserves a Family Act particularly timely. The United States currently has an uneven system of state laws, a number of which put up barriers to becoming a foster or adoptive parent based on one’s sexual orientation, marital status or gender identity. A handful of states affirmatively allow gay men and lesbians to adopt jointly, while most states are silent on the issue. Stark’s legislation would correct the patchwork system in the best interests of the children involved.

Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand (D-NY) has announced her intention to introduce the bill in the Senate.

Congressman Stark announced reintroduction of the Every Child Deserves a Family Act at a press conference alongside two alumnae of the foster care system, child welfare experts, and family policy advocates including:

* David Hansell, Acting Assistant Secretary for the Administration for Children and Families at the Department of Health and Human Services
* Linda Spears, Vice President, Policy and Public Affairs for the Child Welfare League of America
* Jennifer Chrisler, Executive Director of the Family Equality Council
* Judith Sandalow, Executive Director for the Children’s Law Center
* Gary L. Flowers, Executive Director & CEO, Black Leadership Forum, Inc.
* Jody Huckaby, Executive Director of PFLAG National (Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays)
* Rev. Lennox Yearwood, Jr., President of the Hip Hop Caucus

Endorsements of the Every Child Deserves a Family Act:

“Far too many children in foster care have little hope for a permanent family and end up being parented by the government,” said Linda Spears, Vice President, Policy and Public Affairs for the Child Welfare League of America. “We must support all qualified adults who are interested in providing a nurturing, adoptive home—regardless of their marital status or sexual orientation. Having a real live, caring parent is incredibly important for ensuring a child’s success. Rep. Stark’s bill represents progress for these children whose goal is to simply be loved.”

“There is an undisputed child welfare crisis in this country, with more than 500,000 children in foster care and 120,000 of them available for adoption. It is time to pass the Every Child Deserves a Family Act to end this unconscionable problem,” said Jennifer Chrisler, Executive Director of the Family Equality Council. “One in four children in this country is being raised by a single parent, two million children are being raised in LGBT households. We all recognize there is no single type of family in America anymore. We must not allow anyone to use politically motivated and specious arguments about safeguarding traditional family structures to deny families to children in need.”

“We know that when youth are in loving homes with families to support them, a whole host of risk factors decrease – they are less likely to experience poverty, homelessness, incarceration, mental illness, and pregnancy,” said Jody Huckaby, Executive Director of PFLAG National (Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays). “Our organization has been supporting parents, families and children all over the country for over 35 years, and we know from our experience that it is in the best interest of every child – and, in fact, the right of every child – to have the loving care and support of a family.”

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The Every Child Deserves a Family (ECDF) Act, reintroduced in the House as H.R. 1681 by Representative Pete Stark, (D-CA) on May 3, 2011, would prohibit any child welfare service provider receiving federal assistance and involved in adoption or foster care placements from discriminating against prospective adoptive or foster parents solely on the basis of their sexual orientation, gender identity, or marital status, or on the basis of the sexual orientation or gender identity of the child involved.

1. Sign our letter to Congress!

4. Read Rep. Pete Stark’s Press Release

(Washington, D.C.), April 28, 2011 – The U.S. Department of Labor today announced that it will explicitly prohibit workplace discrimination on the basis of gender identity within the department. New equal employment opportunity policies, signed by Secretary Hilda Solis, include updated policies on prohibiting discrimination on the basis of sex, including gender identity and pregnancy.

The Transgender Law Center praises Secretary Solis for this important step to level the playing field for current and potential transgender employees of the Department of Labor.

“We applaud Secretary Solis for acting with fairness and equity for its employees,” said Masen Davis, Executive Director of the Transgender Law Center. “We look forward to continuing to work with the administration to respond to the employment-related needs of all Americans – including transgender Americans – and ensure equal access to federal employment programs for everyone.”

“I am expressing my personal commitment to ensure that the U.S. Department of Labor is a model workplace, free from unlawful discrimination and harassment, which fosters a work environment that fully utilizes the capabilities of every employee,” said Secretary Solis. “It is my goal that we achieve and maintain a high-quality, diverse workforce at all organizational levels throughout the department.”

A startling number of transgender and gender non-conforming Californians continue to face workplace discrimination, harassment and unemployment directly linked to their gender identity or expression. As shown in the Transgender Law Center’s 2009 Report, The State of Transgender California, transgender people face twice the rate of unemployment as the general population. The Department of Labor is the federal agency primarily responsible for addressing unemployment. As such, the Department of Labor is well positioned serve as a model employer for transgender people.

The Transgender Law Center views this as the first in many steps the Department of Labor can take to alleviate unemployment for transgender people and others who do not fit narrow gender stereotypes. The Transgender Law Center calls on the Department to ensure that all programs funded by the Department of Labor comply with all local and state laws prohibiting discrimination against gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people.

The department’s policies on equal employment opportunity and harassing conduct in the workplace can be viewed at http://www.dol.gov/oasam/programs/crc/crc-internal/eeo.htm and http://www.dol.gov/oasam/programs/crc/crc-internal/Policy-Statement-on-Harassing-Conduct-in-the-Workplace.htm.

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The Transgender Law Center is a civil rights organization advocating for transgender communities. The Transgender Law Center uses direct legal services, education, community organizing, and advocacy to transform California into a state that recognizes and supports the needs of transgender people and their families. www.TransgenderLawCenter.org.

At COLAGE we know that many people with lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, or queer (LGBTQ) parents face challenges and isolation because their families are not reflected in school curriculum or discussions. We also know that when bills like this are splashed across newspaper pages, twitter, and facebook, people with LGBTQ parents experience increased bullying and discrimination.

Families come in all shapes and sizes so it is vital for our youth that all families are celebrated in schools.

COLAGE contributed to an Amicus Brief in the case.

Beth Teper, Executive Director of COLAGE, asserts, “This is great news! At COLAGE we know that what matters most in a child’s life is the quality and consistency of parenting not the number, gender or sexual orientation of their parents.”

COLAGE extends our congratulations and deep appreciation to our friends at the ACLU for bringing this case and fighting for equality.

Learn more about the case at aclu.org>

The stories of three COLAGE leaders are featured on the website for the new hit film The Kids Are All Right – nominated for 4 Academy Awards: Best Picture, Best Actress (Annette Bening), Best Supporting Actor (Mark Ruffalo), and Best Original Screenplay (Lisa Cholodenko & Stuart Blumberg).

The Focus Features film stars Mia Wasikowska and Jose Hutcherson as 2 kids born through donor insemination to their moms, played by Annette Bening and Julianne Moore. The film is a sensational presentation about a Hollywood donor inseminated family and touches on some of the experiences faced by our families, living in a world that treats us differently.

The Kids Are All Right’s release coincides with the coming of age of a generation of people born to gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and queer people who chose to have children while being out about their sexuality. The film gives COLAGErs a chance to speak out, be heard and share their real-life experiences as donor-conceived people born to LGBTQ parents. What did you think of the film? Was it realistic? Problematic? Validating? Submit your comments below!

COLAGE DI GUIDE!

For more resources, stories, and information check out the COLAGE DI GUIDE! This groundbreaking publication captures the perspectives of donor-conceived youth and young adults who were raised by lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender or queer (LGBTQ) parent. The DI Guide offers testimonials in order to answer the questions and address the concerns of current and future generations of donor-conceived children. It is also an invaluable handbook for current and future LGBTQ parents, as well as teachers and medical professionals.

Share your family story by using the drawing board below. It’s a little tricky, so take your time!

Who is in your family? What would you like visitors to colage.org to know about what makes your family special?

When you’re finished, be sure to share this page with your friends on facebook, twitter, or myspace so they can join in the fun!

Tip: To choose colors click in on the numbers, and a little wheel of colors will pop up!

How did you get involved in the Family Time Project?

I have been working with COLAGE since 2004-2005, when I worked with the Bay Area Chapter’s Youth Leadership & Action Program to produce the film In My Shoes.  My good friend Meredith Fenton was COLAGE’s Program Director for many years.  I became involved with the organization and its efforts through her.

What was it like putting it all together?

The process of creating Family Time was different than any other film I have worked on.  It involved an enormous amount of research; the kind I really enjoy, which involves digging through archives and materials from many sources, selecting events and materials that seem important to the history, and completely creating the film in the editing room.  I checked books out from the library and spent time pouring through COLAGE’s materials, digitizing those materials and annotating them, then supplementing the research with present-day interviews from a few folks who have been major contributors to the movement over the past twenty years.

What was the most challenging part about making the film?

The biggest challenge was that many of the folks who were a big part of the movement are spread around the country, so it was impossible to film interviews with everyone.  The film is not intended to be a complete and thorough history, but rather, an enticing narrative of highlights and anecdotes.  I guess I could say that the biggest challenge was creating a film that felt cohesive and could be easily followed by the viewer, when the sources of the materials were extremely disparate in time, location, format, and point of view.

What was rewarding about making this film?  Did any stories in particular stand out?

It was extremely rewarding to highlight and expose the work of the people who have been in this movement for the long haul.  It was inspiring to speak to Stefan Lynch and Hope Manley, who both recalled the moment they met and the creation of the organization that would eventually become COLAGE.  The story of those two meeting on the set of a talk show — which was ultimately a debacle and typical of media representation of LGBTQ families at the time — reminds us all that we really can make a difference.  There’s no way Hope and Stefan could have known back then what would come of their meeting, but they both recognized a need and acted on it.  The history of COLAGE and every organization that has real impact in the world has those moments, and they are so often lost in the struggle of organizations to stay afloat and make ends meet.  You never know when attending a single event, making a connection with someone, volunteering, or organizing with others will end up changing you in this way, but there is a real lesson to be learned from the story of this movement, and I hope people who watch Family Time will take that away from it.

What role do you see film and media playing in the LGBTQ family movement?

I believe that film and media are critical to any social movement, but particularly in movements that strive to connect and inspire people who may otherwise be isolated.  That includes young people in places where the LGBTQ movement lacks visibility.  With Family Time, I picture and hope that young people all over the country will discover the Family Time film and timeline and will realize not only that they are not alone in their experience, but also that there’s this whole history and struggle that they’re a part of, with a range of experiences that are all valid.  In particular, I think it is important that groups like COLAGE continue to document their work and the stories of the movement they support in an intentional way.  How would we truly understand the civil rights movement if we did not have first-hand accounts, letters, photos, and film from the era — and not just the stuff generated by journalists?

Tell us about the online timeline? How did this idea come about?

I’m a bit of a library and archive geek, and love going through archival materials.  All of my jobs in high school and college were working in libraries, and besides the books and periodicals and databases, what I love about libraries is the hunt.  It is so powerful to see not just museum artifacts, but archival materals and the stories of the real people who created them — folks who wrote letters and left behind objects that tell stories.  A few years ago, I got to work on a project with the James Hormel Center at the San Francisco Public Library that involved an exhibit culled from their archives, and after that, made a short historical film about Harvey Milk’s camera store in the Castro, which was the epicenter of a movement at the time.  Looking through those photos and objects connected me so directly to the people who created them and left them behind.  The Family Time timeline component came out of that — the desire to not only document the movement, but also to expose these materials and make them accessible to people, allow people to do their own investigation of the history and exploration of the stories.

What kinds of things are featured in the timeline?

The timeline consists of photos, documents, videos, and captions for materials coming from numerous sources — from COLAGE’s archive, from folks who have documented the movement and work over twenty years, and from mainstream media and other organizations.  It also serves as a jumping off point, so wherever possible, sources are cited and links provided. 

How can someone contribute to the timeline?

Family Time is intended to be a “living history,” one that will continue to evolve.  You do not need to be a scholar, journalist, or librarian to add something to the Family Time archive, and COLAGE welcomes submissions from members, leaders, and regular folks who have something to contribute.  The most important thing about materials contributed to the timeline are not the materials themselves, but the information provided about the materials — the title, date, and description, mainly.

Is there anything else you’d like to share about Family Time?

Family Time is an archive and history that belongs to all of us.  It excites me to think about where COLAGE and the movement might be in another twenty years.  What will we think is important then?  What will the story of this movement be?  And what might you or I do today that could end up becoming a timeline event of the future?  I hope that there are numerous young COLAGErs out there who will become the stewards of this movement and the writers of their own history.